Old and Unfashionable

Thanks to Youtube, I can share my love of Arab pop stars with anyone foolish enough to humor me. "Wait! Just one more! This Nancy Ajram video is awesome! The guy's deaf! Where are you going?"

I roped my 12 year old L.A. born and raised cousin into sitting through one of these sessions. In return, she got to show me the music her generation likes these days. It's not Hannah Montana, to my surprise, but some other Disney with a name that escapes me but reminded me of a latte. (Levi Mochiato?) And vampires.

I was showing her the latest Dana video (ana alasl) when my aunt joined. She mentioned that Dana would be considered somewhat chunky in American media.

Are you fucking kidding me?

At least Syria and America are decided on one thing: tight jeans. Pants that are tight to the ankle are not a Syrian thing, as I supposed, but were everywhere in America. Especially LA. Leggings, often in lieu of pants, are popular in both places as well. Actually, the styles in Syria and America were pretty much the same. My cousin laughed at my flare jeans, as much as my boyfriend does in Syria. The windbreaker I wore to go out on the town was considered as uncool in the States as it in Syria (I don't care! It's freaking cold!) .

Is this what globalization portends? A world in which I can go nowhere without being confronted with stupid skinny jeans? Where the fashion is the same across 11 time zones and supposedly huge cultural gaps? Last summer an American friend went to visit the States and came back with this report: fat and naked. Perhaps it was too early for the expanses of American flesh to emerge, but I still think it's going to be the same basic fashion in NY and Damascus come summer as well.

Whatever. I am now of an age where I can refuse to care about fashion. I liked the pants we were wearing in the late 90s/early 00s and that's what I'm sticking with, and that's what I'm going to stick with for the next 20 years.

This is exactly why I'm going to grad school: sweats for the next 5-6 years. I am officially old and it is damn comfortable!

The Eyes!

I was walking around lower Manhattan when I could no longer contain my happiness. "Look!" I said to my friend. "No one is looking at me! No one!" I did a little dance on the sidewalk. No one even acknowledged this.

It was true everywhere in America. I walked into grocery stores, bars, parties, subway cars, streets, apartment complexes, and university cafeterias, and was ignored. It was awesome.

A day after arrival back in Syria, changing servees in Baramke, I really missed the anonymity. Dudes, from those shoulder-high on me to those whose own daughters could be my mother, were staring. Not even attempting to be subtle, some dudes had eyes zeroed in on my chest from a distance of 10 meters to when they walked by.

I don't think this is merely a reflection of my being foreign. Since my coloring could be that of a Syrian, my foreign-ness is usually betrayed by my lack of style. Even on days where I could be, and am, mistaken for a Syrian before opening my mouth, there is the staring. And my Syrian girlfriends all draw looks as well. I might be just extra-sensitive to it, though in the grand scheme some staring is a small annoyance.

But to be without it! So freeing! In Syria, my attempts to sidewalk dance are always blocked by my well-meaning friends exclaiming "Eib!"

In America there is no eib. There is, however, weirdness. My friends in America did give me weird looks every time I would stop and say "Look what I can do!" while breaking it down on the sidewalk. "Isn't this cool?"

Their eyes said no, but all their mouths said was "Come on. We're going to be late."

Back in the Syria

I've been ramboling around the US, enjoying free beer from universities and friends' couches, and then was occupied by deciding my future. It's done at this point: Come fall, I'm going to grad school in California! I've never been one for that coast, though on my travels I discovered interesting things about it. For example: did you know that between Los Angeles and San Francisco there is lots of Iowa? Seriously, nothing but cows.

But I'm back in Syria, finally.

Visiting the universities got tiring, and everytime people would ask me where I was visiting from I always felt a little sheepish saying Syria. The conversation would then inevitably turn to Syria as it wouldn't have had I said Michigan. I love talking about Syria, but answering the same questions got somewhat tiring.

"Syria? Really?"
Luckily most people at these universities knew where Syria was - in other cases not so. I had a dismal amount of people quizzically ask: Syria, where's that? Not that I could pinpoint every country on earth, but shit I'm sure I'd get at least continent and probably region right.
Miming with my hands, I would create a virtual map of Lebanon to the West, Iraq to the East, Turkey to the North, Jordan to the South... Israel to the South-West (only if absolutely needed).

Oooh, that part of the world. Luckily American foreign policy makes several of the neighbors' names recognizable to even the most ardent news-avoider.

Several people asked me if it was safe, if I had to go around in one of those veil things. I met an Iranian-American girl on one of my many planes who was coming back from a recent visit to the Old Country. She asked if in Syria we too had to veil.

I understand that not everybody can be up on the veil politics of every Muslim-majority country, but I wish thinking mandatory veiling is the norm weren't so prevalent- as in actuality, those are the exception, rather than the rule. I'm no slouch in the traveling department and I've never been anywhere the hijab was mandatory other than the inside of mosques.

America was nice though - it has been a while, a year and a half since I last saw my watan. I banned anyone from celebrating my visit with trips to Middle Eastern/Mediterrean restaurants. Funny, many people thought that would be a good suggestion. Sure, I love the shit but I'm ready for some variety. Give me spicy. At a Punjabi restaurant in Michigan the spicy forced tears out of my eyes. Delicious.

But it's back to the ruz and fasoliya (rice and beans)! After a month I was happy to see them again!

Amerrica

So it's finally come time for me to visit my watan. It's only a visit, for now, as I see grad schools and the family.

It's been a while, ya US. When I left it was Sept 07 and every one hated the government but there was mooooney! Now I'm half-expecting to find abandoned, decaying buildings where the luxury high-rises in New York were going up. And Michigan... things weren't all that great back in the boom, and now I imagine they'd be worse. Much worse.

Anyways, ya America, looking at cha in March.

Ad Hominum

I've traveled quite a bit throughout the Middle East, to places where people have good reason to be angry at America. From Egypt, where our foreign aid helps prop up a discredited and hated regime, to Lebanon, where we supported Israeli occupation of the south for some 18 years, and more recently, a war. Yet the amount of times I personally was a target of even negative remarks? Maybe twice... if you count the farmer in the countryside around Saida in Lebanon who, after giving me directions and asking where I'm from, said, "Ah America! No!" and jokingly mimed that he was pointing a weapon at the car. Then he told me about his cousin's son in New Jersey or something, and waved as we drove off. This was in 2006, a few months before the war.

The only other tme was a friend of a family I used to live with, who visited once and was very proud to tell me that he hated America and all things American. The son pushed for clarification, saying you possibly couldn't mean the people too? Yes, I mean the people. I hate them too. I won't even eat pizza.
I pointed out that pizza is Italian.
Whatever, I won't eat hamburger either!
I pointed out hamburger is German.

The man was steadfast in his hatred of Coca-Cola, the government, and the American people, but stating this hatred was the extent. And that is the one incident among almost two years total of Arab world livin' and travelin'.

From Iraqi refugees in Damacus, most of whom have had their lives and livelihoods taken away from them because of my government, I have never been cause of any negative reactions. Governments are governments, people are people, I'm told. Even when my country directly attacked Syria and people were in the streets burning my flag in anger, nothing against me personally.

So it is very sad to me that this enlightened view does not hold true in all cases. There is a lot of hostility against Syrians in parts of Lebanon. I've heard dudes saying how a car with a Syrian liscense plate in Beirut is going to be stolen or fucked with, no doubt. One of my friends who lived in Beirut the past six months told me how she had to be careful not to speak in Syrian when trying to find a job. And then there are the stories of Syrian dudes getting beat up. At one point a couple months ago I was considering relocating to Lebanon and my boyfriend expressed reservations - of course I'd be fine, as an American girl, but there might be some trouble for him, he said. I know obviously all Lebanese are not hating on the Syrian people, but it's very sad to me that there are some willing to take their anger out on people.

Yes! Just Like That!

Did you know every social movement in any other society has an antecedant in American history? No?

I'm sick of seeing articles or hearing events in other cultures place somewhere on the American (or Western European) timeline. This is especially blatant with women's issues, but exists in other contexts, like this article in the NY Times today on "Jordanian Students Embracing Conservative Islam"

Across the Middle East, young people like Mr. Fawaz, angry, alienated and
deprived of opportunity, have accepted Islam as an agent of change and
rebellion. It is their rock ’n’ roll, their long hair and love beads. Through
Islam, they defy the status quo and challenge governments seen as corrupt and
incompetent.

Wow! Our rebellion was so innocent, with love beads and long hair, while theirs is Islam. I assume the journalist is attempting to help Americans understand this phenomenon by relating it something they know. But would that passage really suffer desprived of that reference? I doubt it. Why can't the Jordanians feel angry and alienated and want change without it being related to some American social movement from 40 years ago?

Shoes update

Two days after letting the store manager send the shoes off to the factory, he called us. Yes, the factory had found a flaw so the Dutchman could get a new pair or his money back. He opted for the cash. To celebrate the improbable victory we went to Vitality, a bar in Jeramana that has to be one of the coolest in Damascus, if it had more business. We played Syrians vs. Ajanab pool, in which I shamed my people.

Afterwards I stopped my Im Tareq's house, where I had left my purse earlier.
"I was just watching the news," she said, "and they were interviewing ajanab in America about the shoes. All of them were laughing!"
I had told her before that a majority of the American people weren't too fond of their leader.

Protesting on Cue?

The Syrian nightly news on Thursday night, the day of the protests, was all about the raid. The first segment was a long piece about the protests. There were many, many interviews with protestors: several men, a kid who started crying when talking about how the Americans came in and killed eight innocent people, a teenage girl with a Lattakian accent who said that Syrians can't be quiet, they need to let America know that this is their land and they will defend it.

I was watching the newscast with a friend's family. They agreed that the crying kid was moving, but... c'mon mubaligha shway (little exaggeration)? Tareq said he would understand if the kid was from Albou Kamal, but he's Shami. Effective kid though.

It was especially angering to see the condenscending New York Times write-up of the protests, "As if on Cue, Syrians Protest U.S. Incursion on Their Soil". Would that cue be the U.S. incursion on their soil and the killing of a bunch of civilians? No, no, according to the writer the entire thing is stage-managed by the Syrian Government. It would have to be, because obviously Syrians wouldn't feel real anger about this or anything.

The writer continues, basically saying, "So not that I was there and watched it or anything, but I saw it on the BBC and it (now actual quote) 'seemed likely that the government had orchestrated the protest, which looked precisely timed and organized.'" He then later calls the raid the "boldest" strike by American commandos since the invasion of Iraq. Yippee!

Ok, obviously protests here need the approval of the government, but that doesn't necessarily mean the emotions or anger of the protestors are less valid. Is it too hard to believe that the Syrian people would be, as their government is as well, outraged by the strike?

The rest of the of the Syrian broadcast featured the Minister of Social Affairs and Labor, who had been sent to the village by the president. She offered condolences and hugged children (Um Tareq exclaiming "Olee! So dirty!"). One little boy told what happened, with the two helicoptors landing, and how the soldiers came out speaking foreigner and firing in all directions. His accent was almost unintelligble for me, but then it was for every one else in the room as well. The Minister gave a very nice speak though I can't remember what she said.

And then the next day I bought some shampoo at a little store near my new apartment. "Where are you from?" the woman working there asked.
"America"
"America! Haha, we all want to go there and you come here! Welcome, welcome!"
In the end, she knocked 15 lira off the price of the shampoo because "it's your first time in my store. Welcome!"

I mean, sorry America, but I can't imagine a foreigner getting that kind of treatment in America if their country just attacked it.

Voting

I voted yesterday. The absentee ballot finally arrived two days ago. I did what I usually do during elections, since I have always been outside of my State. I googled the candidates to see their positions. This is especially helpful for the judges' races, which in Michigan are non-partisan. Just names on a ballot. But with a little googling I find their endorsements. "Voters for Traditional Values" supports you? No thanks!

The ballot has to be in by the election, so the regular mail was out (usually takes three weeks). I paid 1000 lira for it to be in American in four days. The guy at the post office asked if it was for the election.
"Did you pick McCain or Obama?"
"Obama, of course!"

He smiled and then asked, "He's the black one right?"
"Yes."
"But aren't you worried he might do things against the whites?"
"No." I laughed. Like do what? "His policy is better than McCain's. He might work for better relations with Syria."
"But you are white. You don't know what some one will do once they get power..."
"He will be better than Bush and that's what's important."

I mean, what do you say to that?

The clerk then asked, "He's Muslim, right?"
"No, he's Christian. But his grandfather was Muslim and he lived in Indonesia when he was younger so he should think more internationally than Bush. And he's not scared of Muslims."

I wonder if he got the same email. With all the questions I get about prejudice in America and about how Americans hate Muslims, I'm actually kind of impressed this dude thought America was on the verge of electing a Muslim president.

Demonstrations

The Cultural Center and I imagine, the school, are not closed yet, but the American Embassy is closed today for security reasons. I was there yesterday trying to get some paperwork and everything seemed normal. I heard there had been demonstrations, but yesterday morning the Embassy was quiet as Abu Romaneh usually is.

Finally saw three demonstrations on the way to Baramke this morning. Mostly school boys holding aloft flags and pictures of the president, chanting as they walk down the street and not to school.

Surprise!

So the American Cultural Center is still up and running. They've received no official word from the government to shut down. I imagine this is true for the school as well. So despite all the press reports on Syrian media, they're not closed. Yet.

Reaction to American Raid

The fallout from the American raid in Syria on Sunday is beginning. It's been announced that the American School and American Cultural Center is going to be closed in retaliation.

The American School, like others all over the world, follows American curriculum and has classes in English. A lot of the teachers are Americans (I've only met 3, who are here for an "adventure" and don't speak any Arabic). The kids of different embassies' employees go there, the kids of multinational corps and orgs employees, plus some well-to-do Syrians. It's got some posh real estate in Abu Romaneh, near al-Jahiz Park and the Air Force building. The Cultural Center is connected to the embassy and does pretty innocuous stuff like advise Syrian students who want to study in the US and have a weekly movie night.

I'm surprised, since I was in the American Cultural Center today picking up my absentee ballot and nobody mentioned anything or seemed flustered.

What's not closing is the American Language Center (where I just took my GRE Saturday), which is generally acknowledged to be among the best places to learn English in Damascus.

About the raid itself, I hear American media saying the dead are militants including some big fish Iraqi named Abu Ghadiya. But of course they would say that (how long does it take American officials to admit to various bombings of weddings in Afghanistan?) The Syrian media is saying the raid took place at a farm and all the dead are civilians, including three children. How much of either can be believed?

The one thing every non-Syrian news source, Arab and American, agrees on is the location being Abu Kamal, despite that the name is actually al-Bou Kamal. It's ok American journalists, I saw al-Jazeera get it wrong this morning as well.

But the one fallback that I'm not expecting, and that the American community in Syria has been advised to keep a lookout for, it the personal. While I would fully expect Americans to bear personal animosity for the nationals of a country that attacked them (just look at the rise in hate crimes against Muslims after 9/11) I don't expect it of Syrians. Today I ate dinner at a friend's house. The topic came on the news and they asked me why America would do that and if I thought it was a bad thing to kill those poor people. But it wasn't like I was being blamed, just that maybe being an American would give me some insight.

But in terms of the reaction for being in a country that is attacked by your country? To me, closing the school and the cultural center isn't all that bad. In Sha Allah they'll open again later. I might need a job teaching at that American school someday!

Independence Day in Damascus

July 4th I went to a party of mostly Americans at a shared house in the old city, the first time I've hung out with foreigners my age in a long time. After I finished at the university, there was little chance to see foreigners on a daily basis, and the friends I had made all eventually traveled back home. There were a spattering of non-American foreigners as well, mostly Brits and Dutch, who were more than happy to join in the Ammerican merrymaking. I had no idea there were this many Americans here. I was told in the summer the number jumps big time.

But nothing brings you home like vodka watermelon. The party organizers had tried to get some pork, but found the massive half of a wild boar, shot in Jordan and presented to them in a plastic bag at a liquor store in Damascus, unappetizing. Understandably so. I know there are places to get pork in Damascus, in containers other than plastic bags, but not being a big fan of pig I couldn't offer the hosts any direction.

They grilled chicken instead, and I opted to eat some cake.

Muslims are Similar to American Anti-Contraception Pharmacists

In the current Pharmacists-for-Life controversy in the States, on a group of pharmacists who refuse to sell birth control, some writers like to make analogies to show just how crazy these pharmacists are and how wrong it is for them to shove their beliefs down others' throats. And guess who is a great analogy for that? Muslims! And racists, naturally.

I usually like this blog, because they write some posts on international reproductive health, but I was not a big fan of this recent post from Reproductive Health Reality Check:

If a pharmacist refused to fill out a Viagra prescription for a black man he saw walking around with his white wife, we would have no problem seeing this behavior as bigotry, even if said pharmacist claimed that Jesus told him to do it. But if a pharmacist refuses to sell birth control pills to a woman who isn't wearing a wedding band, somehow that's legitimate religious expression, even though his rights are extending well past her nose. If Muslim pharmacists started refusing to fill out prescriptions for Christians because those Christians don't share their beliefs, we would have no problem seeing that the religious freedom pinched was that of the customer's, not the pharmacists.

Because you know that's a part of Islam: refusing to give medicine to Christians. What? Sorry, where did you pull that out of?

Earlier post from the same blog:

If, however, we're going to let everyone's political beliefs or religious enthusiasms govern our important life decisions, then we must allow that any political or religious convictions can hold sway. In this case, why not permit a Muslim fundamentalist pharmacist to simply put up a sign politely explaining that his religious beliefs require him to deny a woman's prescription for any medication? No doubt Aryan pharmacists have a belief system too. Why should they be forced to violate their dearly held beliefs and serve blacks?

Because Muslims hate women? I think I remember hearing that sura, in which antibiotics and allergy medication are denied to women. It's a core religious conviction in Islam.

From Feministe:

What happens if next, pharmacists or doctors refuse to serve non-Christians? Or if it comes back to bite them in the ass when, say, a conservative male Muslim paramedic refuses to touch women? Or if religious doctors and pharmacists decide that STDs are appropriate punishments for the sexually active and refuse to fill prescriptions for treatment medicine? Or if a paramedic or doctor refuses to deliver the baby of an unmarried woman?

Cause Muslim men never touch women, and Muslim doctors don't perform thousands of procedures everyday on women. If any man did have qualms about touching women, I doubt he would become a paramedic, which I think is the point of this post: don't become a pharmacist if you can't do the freaking job.

I understand why Muslims are getting thrown into the mix, alongside Aryans (do they mean Iranians and northern Indians?) and racists. It's an attempt to expose the hypocrisy of these right-wing movements, that are all for respecting religion as long as that religion is Christianity. But claiming Muslims would deny medicine to Chrisitans or to women, is smearing Muslims based on common stereotypes:
1) that Muslims hate Christians
2) that Muslims hate women, I mean, they must since they veil them and don't let them drive and don't let them get an education and... 60 other misconceptions people have about Muslim women.

There are other analogies that could be made, such as an orthodox Jew refusing to give out condoms (according to some Talmudic interpretations, birth control is allowed for women but not for men, so pill in, condom out), but of course Jews just aren't as scary as Muslims.

Later in the Feministe post, I think they did a better job with analogy:

Wingers were all up in arms about the Somali women who wanted to wear more traditional clothing to work (even though they were still doing their jobs) and the Muslim cab drivers who wouldn’t pick up passengers who had alcohol on them, but if it’s fundamentalist Christianity that’s an excuse for not doing what you were hired to do, and if it’s women you’re refusing to help, then it’s a-ok.

This exposes the hypocrisy of the right, eager to defend the right of Christians lock-step with their views to exercise their religious views, but quick to lambast Muslims for the same. And this features actual events where Muslims felt that some aspect of their job and their beliefs were at odds, not random hypothetical that accuse Muslims of hating Christians and women. When, from personal experience, I know many who are very fond of both, especially the combination. Oohh!

Red Wings Won the Stanley Cup!

On June 4th. And I totally missed it. Growing up, the Detroit Red Wings were my second-most beloved team, right behind the Michigan State Spartans. Luckily they rewarded my family's devotion with several Stanley Cups, the last one when I was in highschool.

I seriously live on the moon. Why has no one told me about this? My dad emailed me with my brothers' graduation pics, but no hockey news. My mother let me know when Hillary dropped out, as if that wasn't on the news here, but no hockey news. Why did my dad and I spend yesterday talking about the Netherlands-France game in the Eurocup, but for the last several months no one mentioned the Red Wings were in the playoffs and then WON THE FREAKIN' STANLEY CUP?

I realize I could have gone online and followed this myself, but hockey is one of those things that slips that mind when one leaves Michigan for the Arab World. When I was laboring over some Arabic poetry from the Middle Ages, hockey didn't occur to me, nor when I was writing materials for UNFPA on the UN Syria website. This is why people have parents and friends from highschool: to let them know about hockey.

Muslims to Potentially Call for the Blood of Obama

Obama just can't win.

First he was criticized for being too "in" with the Muslims. He was accused of being one, of being indoctrinated at an Islamic madrassa in Indonesia, of expressing sympathy for the Palestinians, and for the endorsements of Hamas. While Obama has replied by shoring up his "I love Jesus" cred and declaring himself no less a friend of Israel than Clinton, the insinuations continue.

Now, an op-ed in the New York Times goes the other way: Obama would piss the shit out of Muslims. The author, Edward N. Luttwak of the conservative thinktank Center for Strategic and International Studies, begins by benignly praising Obama's charisma and well-organized campaign - this so we know that what follows isn't an attack on Obama, just fact.

Theoretically speaking, Luttwak posits, Muslims the world over would demand Obama's blood, should he become president.

What? Oh, I'm sorry, Luttwak's position is a bit more nuanced:

As the son of the Muslim father, Senator Obama was born a Muslin under Muslim law as it is universally understood. It makes no difference that, as Senator Obama has written, his father said he renounced his religion. Likewise, under Muslim law based on the Koran his mother's Christian background is irrelevant...

Wow! who knew that you could be born Muslim? However do the babies say the shahada? As far as I know, Obama has never had said the shahada (profession of faith), and therefore has never even been Muslim. Islam is not a religion; not a race.

Senator Obama is not a Muslim. He chose to become a Christian, and indeed has written convincingly to explain how he arrived at his choice and how important his Christian faith is to him. His conversion, however, was a crime in Muslim eyes; it is "irtidad" or "ridda," usually translated from the the Arabic as "apostasy," but with the connotations of rebellion and treason.

Oh my god you're using Arabic! And well enough to scoff at simple translations of "ridda", since you know the connotations as well! Bravo! But, since Obama has never actually been Muslim - can he really be an apostate?

Indeed, it is the worst of all crimes that a Muslim can commit... the recommended punishment is beheading at the hands of a cleric... It is true that the criminal codes in most Muslim countries to no mandate execution for apostasy.

But that last part doesn't matter because we all know that Muslims are thirsting for blood no matter what the criminal codes of their countries say! He goes on to mention two famous cases of apostates: an Iranian man in 1994 and an Afghani man in 2006. Luttwak does allow that even Iran or Saudi Arabia would probably not prosecute President Obama, but

...another provision of Muslim law is perhaps more relevant: it prohibits punishment for any Muslim who kills any apostate, and effectively prohibits interference with such a killing. At the very least, that would complicate the security planning of state visits by President Obama to Muslim countries, because the very act of protecting him would be sinful for Islamic security guards. More broadly, most citizens of the Islamic world would be horrified by the fact of Senator Obama’s conversion to Christianity once it became widely known — as it would, no doubt, should he win the White House. This would compromise the ability of governments in Muslim nations to cooperate with the United States in the fight against terrorism, as well as American efforts to export democracy and human rights abroad.

Right. The incredibly lengthy and seemingly unending election has not provided opportunity enough to get to know this new guy - despite the fact that al-Jazeera has been inundated with coverage of the race, which is only displaced by news from Gaza or Lebanon. And naturally, Obama's being an "apostate" would hurt America's war on terror and rapport with the Muslim world more than the man who started a war, calling it a "crusade," and is overflowing with love for Israel. As for exporting democracy and human rights abroad - I don't think the US could be doing much worse than currently, so why not try the apostate?

The worst part about this article is that is sees the "Muslim world" as a vast monolith, mentioning only Saudi Arabia, Iran, and Afghanistan to represent this massive and diverse region. The Muslims themselves are not individual people, with the ability to say, measure a man's supposed apostate-ness versus his policy in deciding whether or not to stone him, but a herd of sheep expected to bleat hatred once the secret is out. It is obvious that Luttwak has not spoken to a single Muslim, but who needs to when scripture tells you everything you need to know about the adherents of a religion?

While Syria is not representative of every Muslim country, every person I've talked to here about the American election is now solidly behind Obama. They note his international background, how he wants to pull troops out of Iraq, and his being black, which I'm told "is a good step for America". A few people have told me that they hope his having Muslim family in Kenya means he will be less biased against Muslims than the current administration. In Tunisia, another, very different Muslim country, I only spoke on the subject with two people, when they brought it up, asking me if I was going to vote Obama since they want him to win.

But what do I know? I'm no thinktank. So take your pick: either Obama is too sympathetic to The Muslims (and thus, terror) or he's going to cause them to all go batshit insane and hurt the wonderful democracy-spreading America's been up to lately. Either one is obviously a valid reason to Vote McCain.

Racism in America, Outside of It

I was finishing up an English lesson in Sitt Zeinab on Sunday, when an Iraqi dude came into the class and asked me for help. His family found out they had been granted refugee status in America that morning, and they would be moving to Chicago Tuesday (today). The government sets them up with an apartment and English classes for a set period. He was asking if I knew anyone in Chicago that could help him, and if he could get my email just to use as a resource on America. This is the third family from the school that have been granted refugee status. The other two went to Atlanta.

Then the guy asked if he would be safe in Chicago. "Of course!" I said. "It's a nice city, cold in winter, but nice. You have to be careful, but it's not that dangerous."

"But what about the blacks?"

"What?"

"Isn't there a war between the blacks and the whites?"

This is always awkward. Everyone has seen "Crash," in addition to every other movie that addresses race in America. The family I used to live with was surprised when I said something that hinted my non-hatred toward blacks. "But don't most the whites hate the blacks? We saw Crash." Or talking to my friends, when I objected to a conversation in which two participants expressed opposite preferences - one for black chicks and the other for white chicks. "What's wrong with that?"

"You're talking about people like ice cream flavors."

"So? I don't think black women are that attractive. He does. I don't hate blacks. I'm not racist, like Americans."

"We're not all racist!"

"Why are the criminals in TV shows and movies always black?"

"..."

Fuck. While racism obviously exists in America, it isn't THAT bad. Though I'm speaking from a position of white privilege, it's not as if everyone is a frothing racist. I mean, at least there's a committment to recoil at the surface of racism, such as expressing sexual preferences for different races or making "Asian eyes". I struggle with trying to convey racism in America. How, while far from perfect, it's better than it was. How it's not "Crash", but it's not a rainbow of races holding hands and singing. How some films like to delve into racism because it does exist, but that doesn't mean most of White America is on their porches with guns. It's... complicated.

I told the Iraqi dude not to worry about the race war.

"Do the whites hate Arabs? too"

"No, not really. You'll be fine."

A Realistic Fear

There's a profile on Chris Matthews, very loud pundit on CNBC, in the New York Times Magazine, which includes this interesting travel wish:

As we approached the airport gate, Matthews mentioned that he and his wife, Kathleen, have been contemplating a trip to Damascus. It’s something they have wanted to do for a long time. But he worries that he might make an inviting target for a kidnapper. “I can imagine getting some big-name media figure would be a big propaganda catch for them,” Matthews said. “You can imagine what the neocons would say if I were kidnapped. They’d be like, ‘See, Matthews, terrorism isn’t so funny now, is it?’ ”

What? When was the last time anyone got kidnapped in Damacus? Who does that? I sent out an email to his show inviting him to come to Damascus where many Americans and other foreigners go days without being kidnapped. But I guess we aren't big-name media figures like Mr. Matthews.

What do You Think About Islam?

I have been occaisonally asked this question by two broad groups of people: Muslims in the Middle East, and non-Muslims in America.

The question always catches me off guard coming from the former group. It's not an everyday occurance, somewhere around 1/100 of how often I'm asked my marital status. I'll meet some one new, we'll chat, and then, working to maintain the causual ambience, they will ask what I think about Islam. The question is dropped in apropos: "Your Arabic isn't bad. What do you think about Islam?" My answers to this are always awkward. "Oh, Islam? It's... cool." Sometimes the question is worded in such a way to imply that I, as an American, may have a problem with Islam. "Oh no, I don't have any problem with Islam. It's... cool. I like the sweets at Eid."

C'mon, what does one answer to this? "What do you think about Baptists?" Um, I don't really. "What do you think about Hindus?" That they are... fine... and stuff? The question is weird to me because, like "Weren't you expecting us all to be terrorists, what with the lies of your media?" I thought my existance in the country would preclude an affirmative answer. "Thanks for asking. Islam actually scares the shit out of me." I mean, that's why I live here. For the thrill.

Once I've answered that I have no problems with Islam, and that all religions are pretty much the same, the other person is usually happy to have met an unbrainwashed American. Sometimes, they dig to find out what I know about Islam, which is quite a bit, surprising them.

With the second group, non-Muslims in America, the question is usually delivered in a lowered voice, conspiratorally. You can tell me. I got this after going back from Egypt. I considered it the follow up to the warnings that preceded my going to Egypt: Be careful, you know, there's a lot of Muslims there.

I tell these people that Islam is... fine. People are normal. They do their shit. I knew I'd stayed up too late hearing the 4am-ish call to prayer. I don't really know what this group is expecting, maybe something along the lines of "IT'S CRAZY!" Or maybe they really are just curious to hear "what it's like" from someone who has been in a Muslim country.

I'd like to see what would happen if the first group asked the second.

Bush Comes to the Middle East

Bush came to the Middle East yesterday morning: I was at Manar's house and we happened to catch the pomp and circumstance of his visit to Israel live on every news channel.

Amid the backdrop of the plane and mixed American and Israeli flags, Bush descended, greating Olmert like an old friend. Children waved American and Israeli flags, and Bush and Olmert both gave speeches about the strong friendship between the two states. Because it wa live al-Jazeera had no translation so I translated a bit for Manar.

Why the show? Everyone who has talked to me about the visit, including Manar, immediately rolled their eyes. "And he's going to achieve peace? Yeah, as if we don't know what side he's on." We already knows what side he's on, so why make a big show about it? It only makes everyone on the other "side" all that more certain of the pun my Arabic teacher has repeated nearly daily since Anapolis - ana bolees - Arabic for "I am the police". Bush isn't interested in real peace or in the Palestinian people, just in control and Empire etc. Do we really need singing Israeli children or the image of six-pointed stars and stripes to reconfirm the suspicions of the non-Israel lovin' world?

But maybe I should give Georgie a little credit. Maybe, just maybe the show is a sign to Israelis that America really really supports them and Bush really really loves them, so when (please let it be when, not if) the American president requests difficult sacrifices - like "stop building those settlements that you've been saying you would stop building since Oslo" - the Israelis will oblige, secure in the knowledge that Bush really really loves them and cares about their security and is only asking because these sacrifices are neccessary.

Or maybe the love-fest is just straight-up love for Israel, no matter how it may play on al-Jazeera.