Why do Dudes Sing to Dudes in Arabic?

This is something that has bugged me for a while. In most Arabic music, male singers often sing to/about ostensible females, but use all male forms (Arabic differs between the male and female you as well as he/she). At first, it messed up my comprehension:
"Why is he waiting for a man with his name tattooed on his arm?"
"No, it's a woman, his lover, she has his name tattooed on her arm."
"Well then he should say eeda and not eedu!"

I'll still mistake the third-person female (she) for the second person male (same verb form in Arabic) even though the second-person male is actually supposed to be a female! It's very confusing! And just... strange. If he means a lady, why don't he talk to her like a lady? Lady singers in Arabic sing to/about men, using masculine forms.

Most of my friends who I've brought this up to don't think it's that strange. "Oh, we're used to that. All of the songs are like that." There's no confusion. Of course he's singing to a girl, even though he's saying inta and bhbak (rather than inti and bhbik). Cause there's no way he would be singing to guy.

There are notable exceptions, such as Kazim asSahir's songs based on Nizar Qabanni's poetry, as Qabanni was all about the ladies. But for the most part, it's habibi, not habibti.

Possible explanations?

1) Melody.
This is what most Syrian I ask think. Try to sing "inti ghaliyya" in the same melody as "inta ghali" (Amr Diab). Don't work. So the male forms work better with melody. I don't buy this, as the melody or words can easily be changed around. I can sing "inti helwa" perfectly in sync with Amr Diab. Arabic isn't the only language with male and female forms, and somehow the others manage to sing to/about the ladies, addressing them as ladies.

2) Eib!
An Italian friend getting her master's in Arabic literature told me this theory. In classical poetry, it was considered immodest and rude and whatever to address a lady as such, so they used male forms. The convention continues. It's possible, though I've read some pretty rude classical poetry (with both the قديب and the ماء الحسن which eminates from it).

3) Respect.
I can't remember where I heard this one first, but I definitely heard it. The poet loved his lady so much and had so much respect for her that he would write to her as a male. A sadeeq is better than a sadeeqa! A weird theory, but possible?

If anyone has any idea or other theories, help! It's been driving me crazy for a year.

Power Outages

are becoming a bit annoying. They were common during the summer, every midday (this on the authority of my roommate, as I was usually at backup-generator-powered work). This fall it seemed the power was out most mornings when I woke up, meaning I just changed my routine to shower at night.

Sometimes the power would go out at night, and I would admire the moon. I had never noticed how bright the moon is, that you can actually see things, in detail, by moonlight. That moonlight casts shadows. I noticed this while standing on the stairway next to my open door. Neighbors would pass by and look at me confusedly. I just smiled and said Hi, because explaining that an axe killer might be hiding in my apartment, waiting for a power outage as the opportune time to strike, might get me labled as crazy. With candles, things got better.

But now, power outages are not only daily but several times a day. Today, I have experienced four. The power was out when I woke up, went out at the internet cafe, went out during dinner, and went out when I went back to the internet cafe to finish my previous interrupted session.

But then the power comes back on after a half hour, hour, whatever, we turn the TV to al-Jazeera and watch Gaza coverage. And I realize I should stop my bitching - if I were to trip and injure myself on a power- and moonless night, at least the hospital would have fucking gauze. And not destroyed by a bomb or tankfire.

Iraqi Wedding

With shame, I admit that last night was the first time I have been to a wedding in Syria. While since moving to Syria I have been to a wedding in Pakistan and an engagement party here, no wedding. Early last summer my friend Saleh teased me by inviting me to an upcoming wedding, promising a good time as it would be an Allawi wedding, meaning mixed and drinks (Shami weddings are traditionally gender segregated). But the day rolled around and he was in the village and forgot about me and went and I got to hear about it later.

Last night Um Tareq suddenly announced that she and Um Qassam were going to a wedding and I should come too. This despite a day of traveling that began at 5am- my pleas of exhaustian were ignored. As were the fact that I would have to go in sneakers and less-than-formal wear, everything being packed. And that I was dirty.

"It's fine! Yalla!"

So I went. I asked who's getting married. She told me, oh, I don't know, somebody's relative, which doesn't exactly narrow it done.

The salle was a place called قصر الأميرة, Castle of the Princess, which at least to me sounds less cheesy in Arabic. It was mixed, though mostly ladies. The bride and groom were seated on a raised dance platform, her dress fanned about her. They both looked young and nervous, and for not the first time I couldn't help but think of a wedding as a vulgar affair, announcing to the world the couple's (assumed) sexual initiation. The bride wore the popular style: elaborately detailed bodice, large sweeping skirt, intricate hair, layers of makeup. Um Tareq leaned over, telling me that the bride was fat, but the groom looked neat and na'im. I told her she was a little mean and she said, what, she is fat! Look at her arms, they're full.

The bride turned out to be a relative of Um Rad, a jovial friend of Um Tareq I've met before several times. She was very interested in my joining the party, and anytime a song coaxed the seated to the floor she would grab me by the arm and drag me out there. I got a quick lesson in dancing the "Iraqi way", which involves a lot of head movements. Luckily I'm an ace at the snake so I embressed. But the star of the show was an approximately 8 year old girl, who had tricked herself out for the party: full blue dress, teased up hair with sparkles that flew and glittered in the air every time she flung her hair around. Girl got down, and enjoyed being the center of the dancing ring. The bride joined the dancing occaisonally, but the dress limited substantial movement. There was some debke, but it was nothing like the non-stop debke frenzy I experienced at a Palestinian engagement party this summer.

During dancing breaks, I chatted with some ladies, some of whom I'd met before and most I hadn't. Luckily Um Rad was there to introduce me:
"She's American but she doesn't like Bush," a sentence repeated verbatim with every introduction.
Really? American? The introducee would reply. Then would come questions about America vs. Syria and such. Sadly, Um Rad had some cake-related matters to attend to, and I was briefly left alone dancing with some ladies and their fiances and an eight-year-old without introduction. One woman said she liked how I danced and I returned the compliment.
"Oh! Are you not Syrian?" she said at my accent.
No, no, American.

I left somewhat early, due to aforementioned fatigue, but I might have to honor three engagements to really learn some Iraqi dance.

New Year's Eve in Syria

Many Syrians like to celebrate New Year's Eve like Eid al-Adha or Christmas: going out to a sahara (staying-up-late) at a restaurant, with food, drink, and a singer of varying fame. However, this year, in solidarity with Gaza, all restaurant parties were cancelled by order of the government. I heard the same happened in Lebanon but I don't have any confirmation on that.

So instead, some friends and I met up at out friends apartment and welcomed in the New Year with drinks, dancing, and fireworks. Jeramana has got to be one of the best places for New Year's because the entire neighborhood was going crazy. Baba Noel likes to visit on New Year's here, and I saw several troops of Santas with one or two helpers in animal constumes. Parents pay groups to dress up and deliver presents to their children, which I found out when the upstairs neighbors' kids started screaming in delight.

Other neighborhoods might not be as fun. My boyfriend had to take today off work - it wasn't a holiday for his office. His office is all Muslims and they director found no reason to lose a day of work. He told the director he was taking it off and his coworker told him that New Year's is a Christian holiday and if he celebrates it than he shouldn't celebrate Eid, big or little. This is a coworker who often tries to coax my boyfriend into praying with him, and when I've visited the office he asks me what I know about Islam and if I'd like to know more. "What do you think about Muhammad?"
"He's cool." I usually get out of the situation by saying my standard, "I believe all religions are paths to the same truth" thing and "Oh! look at the time!"

Dude is completely missing the point of living in a multi-confessional society, which is naturally more holidays! I personally can't wait until the number of Muslims in America reaches a critical mass meaning Eid Mubarak specials at the local mall. And no work. A Dutch friend who traveled to Libya last Christmas said there were Christmas trees for sale. Libya is essentially 100% Muslim so he asked the Christmas tree seller about it.
"He's ouir prophet too!" And so he is.
From what I've seen, most Syrians, and the government, embrace the fun of religions and enjoy themselves some breaks. And parties.

Our multiconfessional (Sunni, Shi'i, Allawi, Christian, Druze, athiest) and mulinational (Syrian, Iraqi, American - me!) group got the party started after 11. There was no countdown, instead we all ran to the balcony when we heard the fireworks going off. All the neighbors bought fireworks, from sparklers and roman candles to big ones fired from rooftops. All of Jeramana was lit up. Since we forgot to buy any, we just cheered on the others. After 12 the cellphone networks tied up as all of Syria called to wish each other kul am wa intum bekheer!

Defending Itself

Why is the blockade of Gaza and military incursions always compared to the damn rockets? As if they are morally equivalent? As if they are anywhere on the same scale? The New York Times describes the bombing as "retaliation for rocket fire from the area".

"The Palestinian groups again launched barrages of rockets and mortars into Israel on Sunday, extending their reach further than ever before, and the Israeli government approved the emergency call up of thousands of army reservists in preparation for a possible ground operation."

and later: "Israeli military officials said that the airstrikes, which began on Saturday morning, were the start of what could be days or even months of an effort to force Hamas to end its rocket barrages into southern Israel."

That makes it sound somewhat similar! In fact, it's as if the Israelis are only responding or even retaliating for this horrible barrage of rockets.

Currently around 280 Palestinians dead, with at least 600 wounded. "Several Israelis were lightly wounded by shrapnel."

Yup, sounds about equivalent.

Yes! Just Like That!

Did you know every social movement in any other society has an antecedant in American history? No?

I'm sick of seeing articles or hearing events in other cultures place somewhere on the American (or Western European) timeline. This is especially blatant with women's issues, but exists in other contexts, like this article in the NY Times today on "Jordanian Students Embracing Conservative Islam"

Across the Middle East, young people like Mr. Fawaz, angry, alienated and
deprived of opportunity, have accepted Islam as an agent of change and
rebellion. It is their rock ’n’ roll, their long hair and love beads. Through
Islam, they defy the status quo and challenge governments seen as corrupt and
incompetent.

Wow! Our rebellion was so innocent, with love beads and long hair, while theirs is Islam. I assume the journalist is attempting to help Americans understand this phenomenon by relating it something they know. But would that passage really suffer desprived of that reference? I doubt it. Why can't the Jordanians feel angry and alienated and want change without it being related to some American social movement from 40 years ago?

First Name Last Name

This is something I noticed while translating at the UNFPA: first names are formal. When putting out a press release, a person would naturally first be mentioned with their full title and name, but subsequent mentions could be shortened to as-sayed Ahmad (Mr. Ahmad) or ad-docktora Leena (Dr. Leena). In the English versions, of course, I'd have to refer to them by title and last name. So it seems there's none of that awkward "May I call you by your first name?"

That's it. Just an observation.